>[!citation] >Bourdain, A. (2000). *Kitchen Confidential*. Bloomsbury Publishing. >[!abstract] >*Kitchen Confidential: Adventures in the Culinary Underbelly* is a New York Times bestselling nonfiction book written by American chef Anthony Bourdain, first published in 2000. In 2018, following Bourdain's death, it topped the New York Times non-fiction paperback and non-fiction combined e-book and print lists (Wikipedia, 2025). > [!note] Reading notes > In *[[Hofstadter, 1979|Gödel, Escher, Bach]]*, Douglas Hofstadter offers the idea of a book being padded with filler content past its actual ending, as an exercise for the astute reader to figure out where the concealed ending was. > > I had almost forgotten about this quirky thought experiment, until I read Bourdain’s *Kitchen Confidential* and realized its broader implications. > > What if the same concept applied to our careers? Relationships? Entire lives? What if there was a cumulative peak, a high water mark, a moment that you can point to in hindsight and say that everything past it was just pointless filler? > > It’s an uncomfortable idea because of its key implication: some people having lived an outsized life, like Bourdain, choosing a premature death on their own terms over sticking around for the “little ending”. > > I jotted down below Bourdain’s words from when he was about to begin the Tokyo chapter of his life to better illustrate the point. > > >[!quote]- > >I’m still here, and I’m surprised by that, every day […] I really and truly thought that I had had all my great adventures, that the entertainment and excitement segment of the program was long over. Been there and done that was more of an assumption for me […] Sure, there were things to learn. I learn things all the time. But I’m talking about eye-opening, revelatory, perspective-altering life experiences. The exotic. The frightening. The totally new. I wasn’t about to sample any new experimental hallucinogens at age 43. I wasn’t going to submerge myself in some new criminal subculture, steeping myself in the customs and practices of professional gamblers, heroin seekers, or sexual adventurers, though at one time it would have greatly appealed to me […] My personal journey, I thought, was pretty much over […] The game had long gone into overtime. (Bourdain, 2000). > > I wonder if he felt the same way, but with renewed conviction, when he finally decided to put an end to his tumultuous life. > > His writings encapsulate well what I meant by Hofstadter’s reference to a book that’s already ended but just keeps going; one that the discerning reader may choose to close on their own terms. > ## Days later > A final thought as I close Anthony Bourdain’s Kitchen Confidential. > > The book unapologetically glorifies the brazen machismo of the kitchen industry. It feels dated by modern standards (the book was written in the late 90s). The ability to endure humiliation and pain is considered a virtue, rather than the act of inflicting those on coworkers being considered a sin. > > But, I also strongly believe that we should not judge too harshly the faults of those that came before us, lest we be judged ourselves. > > Societal norms evolve, directionally for the better over long time spans. I have written here about how our attitude toward animals, for instance, will eventually be deemed medieval by some future generation. Perhaps soon enough that we will live to feel the stigma. > > Bourdain felt this change in the zeitgeist before his death, and repudiated his book to some degree, taking on a progressive stance & promoting a fairer treatment of women in the workplace. He had the elegance to redeem himself before checking out.